USA Eve!

T minus 1 to Road Trip USA

I’m sitting in our hotel room near Sydney International Airport. The kids are asleep, the bags are all packed and we’ve checked in to our flights. Our home is now wherever we are in that moment. There’s now nothing between us and a 14 hour flight other than a good nights sleep. The moment has finally arrived and I now feel a sense of relief. We made it! In this moment I’m filled with the jittery sensation of a child on Christmas Eve. I mean, I should feel  jittery excitement right?

Self reflection time

I’ve taken a moment to reflect on everything that has transpired to make this trip possible, everything that needed to fall into place. Over the past 6 months I’ve experienced the giddying highs of jubilation to the absolute lows of doubt. At times it felt like I was already mentally in the USA, on other occasions I believed that we just couldn’t pull a trip to this magnitude off. That’s all past us now, for we are here on the eve of our dream holiday and all tasks are done.

While I pondered the recent past, out of everything we’ve accomplished, one thing stood out. I noted just how often I’ve  allowed stress to take over my thoughts and actions when faced with adversity, when something hasn’t gone smoothly. Crippling my ability to make sound decisions and see clear alternate solutions. I realise now though, my times of stress were completely unwarranted. My wife Alicia has on more than one occasion pointed out to me that stress and worry aren’t one and the same. She explained that It’s possible to worry about something without also stressing about it. While in the moment of being consumed by stress however, this notion seemed nonsensical. My ego chose not to believe, I carried on stressing anyway.

The metaphorical penny has dropped. I have developed a new found appreciation for my wife’s wise words. Absolutely everything we needed to achieve along the way has been achieved or an alternative solution was found. With no thanks to whatever stress I decided to add in each moment. How much more enjoyable could each moment have been and how much quicker could the task have been accomplished without the added burden? I can only imagine.

How excited are you?

I feel a level of shame to admit this, but I haven’t really been that excited this week. It sounds crazy even as I write this, how could I not be? So many people would do anything to get an opportunity like this, but unfortunately it’s the truth. I’ve lost count how many times I’ve been asked by family and friends the levels of my excitement. To which I have given an answer that they expect to hear and move on.

All this week I’ve been telling myself I will be excited after this or that happens, but all I was doing was stressing about the next task I had set myself to do. I never slowed down enough to just enjoy it.

It seems silly now in hindsight, especially because the tasks were quite mundane, like booking a rental car, printing documents, calling airlines etc but it highlights the beast that is stress. The ridiculous power I let it have over me and therefore the negative impact I let it have on the people around me – my family.

The Plan

Rather than dwelling on this however, I’ve decided to see the positive and use my awareness to better myself. I’ve decided to set myself a goal of self development during this trip. Primarily, I wish to disassociate the relationship I have with stress and worry. To break a pattern of behaviour for myself, and improve my mindset and outlook on situations so I can spend more time enjoying life rather than stressing about it. It’s not going to be easy, but it will be worth it in the end.

I’m excited!

So after all that, I feel like I’ve been able to process through my emotions and I’m now thoroughly excited. I can’t believe it’s here, I’m 12 again. I can’t wait to see the kids faces as we step off the plane as their imaginations become reality. The next 3 months making our way around the US taking in whatever experiences are thrown our way a going to be next level amazing and I can’t wait to share those experiences with all of you..first I need to somehow get to sleep…

America – here we come!

 

 

1 thought on “USA Eve!

  1. Mum and I are well aware of everything that had to fall into place for your trip to happen. Three months touring the USA, wow, what an adventure, and an experience for you all. I loved your writing in this your first post before leaving, you have a great style and are a natural at it. You have definitely missed your natural vocation as a journalist! No doubt, all the reading before bedtime when you were little has paid dividends.

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